How to stop being offended by other people: 3 ways

Psychometrists (specialists who study the theory and methodology of psychological measurements, including the measurement of knowledge, abilities, attitudes, and personality traits) consider sensitivity to be a personality trait. Proponents of the Gestalt approach think of resentment as a feeling. Psychoanalysts consider resentment a model of behavior. The theory of the American psychologist and psychiatrist Eric Byrne and his followers will help to better understand how to deal with resentment.

Byrne believed that resentment was a childish model of responding to problems and conflicts.

Where an adult becomes angry, but tries to find solutions, the child will be offended, decide that they do not like him, and stop communicating with a loved one. And the whole view will show that he is unhappy.

Gestalt therapists, like Burn, believe that the roots of this pattern of behavior go back to childhood. But in their opinion, resentment is a feeling, it occurs in a child when he does not receive something valuable from an important person. That is, he didn’t just not get the sweets, but his beloved dad didn’t give them.

Then the child experiences a whole range of experiences: self-pity, anger at dad, but at the same time love for him. All these emotions constitute a grudge and make it one of the most difficult feelings.

According to Byrne, only those who have not given up childish behavior are prone to resentment. But such symptoms are found in many, even if a person seeks awareness and tries to honestly express emotions and not slip into children's behavior. Some situation may remind you of a childhood injury - an adult will “roll back” and react like a three-year-old child.

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