Natalya Remish // Photo: Dilyara Ramazanova
- How to protect child abuse is a complex issue that needs attention from an early age. There is no specific behavior algorithm that would be 100% safe for your child. But of the key points I would single out the following.
To be involved in the life of the child. And this is not about control.
It is important to be interested in, listen when a child wants to tell something, shares his thoughts and stories of his life. And this is not about sex, but simply about human relationships. Then you will know if a drama begins to unfold around the child, and that "the uncle from the next entrance suggested that he go to his house."
Take into account the fact that 80-90% of cases of violence occur with the participation of familiar people. Parents teach children not to talk with strangers, but do not take into account that the danger is much closer.
Therefore, it is so important to know the friends of the child and the adults who surround them. It is important to convey to the child that a “bad touch” is a bad touch, even if it comes from a good person. At the same time, you do not need to teach the child not to trust everyone around him, but you need to talk with him about precautions.
Children love secrets. The phrase "this will be our secret" becomes the key to hide from parents the essence of what is happening.
It’s important to say that neither you nor other people should create a secret with your child. If you do this, the child will continue this story with others.
Use media publications to discuss cases of violence with your child. Ask his opinion, find out if he heard about such situations. Discuss what he would do in such a situation.
Children are afraid to say no to an adult, even when they feel uncomfortable. Therefore, you can offer the option: "I need to go to the toilet."
Rule of underwear: the child should not be touched by other people in those places of the body that are usually covered with underwear. And the children themselves should not touch others in the same places. Read more about this here.
Teach the child to speak the correct language about his genitals. Studies prove that children who know medical terms scare away aggressors. Talk to children from childhood: penis, vagina, anus. You can’t impose this conversation on a ten-year-old child, but a two-year-old will take it with a bang.
Be open to talking about sex.
Under this condition, the child will come to you first with any fears. Listen to it, even if you are not comfortable listening. Often a child may talk about something insignificant, but something more important will come up behind it.
Let the child understand: if something happens, you will be able to support him and will not fly into him. He should feel safe near you.
It is in the feeling of trust that the pledge of child safety lies. If the parents and the child trust each other, they - the parents - will be aware of his life, and the child will not be afraid to tell them anything.
" Your body is your property, and it belongs only to you. If someone touches you and it is unpleasant for you, you have every right to stop a person. Even if he is an adult" .
Often children feel that they are unpleasantly happening, but the habit of obeying elders takes its toll. Teach your child to trust your feelings.
When a child is left with someone to spend the night, take this seriously. Where and with whom will he sleep, who will be at home, do you know these people? Keep in mind that threats can come from other children, especially if there are older brothers or sisters at home.