"Cancer patients are the happiest people." The story of a woman who recovered and adopted 9 children

- Shortly before I found out about In our diagnosis, my husband and I went through a medical examination - we needed to get a custody opinion in order to become candidates for foster parents. Before that, we were regular volunteers at a boarding school, but at some point we realized that if you really want to help a child, he needs to be taken home. As a result of all the examinations, nothing was found in me.

I basically felt great.

Two months later, when we had the coveted conclusion on hand, I felt a small bump in my chest. Despite the fact that my husband advised me to go to the hospital right away, I hesitated. Instead, I shared my problem with a friend. She said that this is a cyst - you need to tie a down scarf and everything will resolve itself.

I naively believed and did as she said, but on the second or third night I felt hot, and when I removed my handkerchief, I found that the lump had increased in a few days and another one had formed in my armpit.

- I had no idea where the oncology center is in our city. Apart from the maternity hospital in which I gave birth to three children, I did not encounter medicine at all and knew nothing but aspirin and activated carbon.

" The story of a woman who recovered and adopted 9 children" src="/assets/images/42b1445e8c61d56c86269df77acb7289/26347e4cbf9b4e8960d3ba9aae0667ab.jpg">

Photo: from the personal archive of Svetlana

When I came to the doctor, he examined me and was alarmed. Out of fright in his eyes, I realized: this is not just a bump. I was given a referral to a mammologist at the Oncology Center. There, an elderly oncologist said that cysts do not form in the armpits and that my case is something more complicated. The next day, they took a puncture from me and a week later they told me to come for the result.

They didn’t scare me, but fear settled inside. I did not understand what was happening, but I thought that everything would pass, now everything is being treated. When I came for the diagnosis, the doctor, seeing me, said that everything was bad and that the breast should be completely removed, and as soon as possible. To say that I was in shock, to say nothing. It probably sounded stupid, but I asked - what will happen then? The doctor answered me: "Scar.

" Without raising her eyes, she gave me a list of doctors whom I had to go through before the operation. I left her office and in tears sank down to the bench in the corridor.

This was the very beginning of December 2010 - the first snow fell. I don’t remember how I got to the clinic - my husband, whom I immediately called, was there. We already went to the orphanage, looked after the boys, and I did not know what to do now.

The husband suggested taking a break, said: "Do not worry and do not be afraid to remove the breast. Many women live without it - there is nothing to worry about. The main thing is to stop the process. The main thing is for you to live."

" The story of a woman who recovered and adopted 9 children" title=""Cancer patients are the happiest people." The story of a woman who recovered and adopted 9 children" src="/assets/images/42b1445e8c61d56c86269df77acb7289/f1f451974f2528c8eadf51333b1d72f4.jpg">

Photo: from the personal archive of Svetlana

Despite the fact that I managed to pass all the tests and go through all the examinations in four days, I hesitated for a long time whether to go or not to go to the operation. I read that there are many different treatments and thought to be treated with celandine or mushrooms. I thought to try a different diet, gastric lavage, one of the unconventional methods of therapy. But since I am a deeply religious person, I decided to go to church.

There they told me to agree to the operation. They prayed for me, anointed me with oil - and I went to the hospital.

I didn’t agree with anyone, I didn’t know any of the doctors, I didn’t have a quota — I went to an ordinary Oryol hospital. Three children remained at home, and deep down I understood that there are things that depend not on doctors, but on God. I completely trusted him and did not begin to look for acquaintances and to raise any kind of connection.

When I was examined again, already before the operation, the oncologist-surgeon said that it might be possible to save the breast.

And it worked out. We managed to save the chest.

" The story of a woman who recovered and adopted 9 children" src="/assets/images/42b1445e8c61d56c86269df77acb7289/2c340598137ecb6b27407682f8b06d1b.jpg">

Photo: from the personal archive of Svetlana

In my head the question arose periodically - for what? Is this a punishment? Or a test for me and my family? Or is this word “stop” written in large red letters because we decided to take foster children? There were many different thoughts, but this question did not cease to sound. On the ninth day after the operation, I had a crisis - a drainage tube clogged to drain the lymph. The temperature rose, I could not sleep, several times passed out before the operating room. There were nine of us in the room, and all the girls threw off their blankets to try to warm me. Nothing helped - the temperature "hollowed out" from the inside.

There was only one thought in my head: "What is all this for?" I was terrified, I felt like a little girl.

- At such moments, you overestimate everything, weigh your life and begin to truly appreciate every moment. Time stops, and looking back, you condemn yourself for spending it on envy, gossip and other stupid things. I thought that if I had to die, how would I do it? With a grumble, anger, annoyance that they are allowed to live, but I need to "leave"? Or with gratitude and humility? I made a decision that I am grateful to God that I lived 36 years in love and care, because I have a friendly family and beautiful children.

Even in my youth, I read out the book "The Cancer Corps" by Solzhenitsyn.

When I took it to the library, they asked me if I could read it, because psychologically it is very difficult. But when I first went to radio exposure, I had no fear - I read about it and imagined the bunker like that - with wide stone walls designed to isolate sick people from healthy people and protect them from radiation. I understood that there are those who will not leave here, but there are those who will leave, but will live differently.

" The story of a woman who recovered and adopted 9 children" src="/assets/images/42b1445e8c61d56c86269df77acb7289/ec2a16b29d4ed6665211e2479b18c531.jpg">

Photo: from the personal archive of Svetlana

I decided to honestly talk about the disease with children. I told them: "Yes, God admitted that I have cancer, but we can handle it. And even if he decides that I will leave, He will take care of you - you will not be left alone." I remember in the hospital I asked my husband: "If I have to leave, do not make me an idol. Be sure to get married.

Alive, you need to think about the living and live on - if not for your own sake, then for the sake of the children." Then the eldest daughter was 14 years old, the second daughter - 12, and the son - 10. Of course, it is very difficult to let the children go - it hurt me to think that I would not see how my daughter was getting married, that I could not straighten her wedding hair, I can advise which dress is better to choose, I can not share any secrets, I will not see how my son grows up and grows up. I was thinking about all this.

You know, there almost no one sleeps at night.

Everyone cries - everyone scrolls his life and thinks. He thinks a lot. There there are no unbelievers - everyone clings to God as the only, last and most correct hope. At night, when I wanted to howl into a pillow, I just read the Psalter or the Holy Scriptures. It helped me.

- They love you very much. Everyone is trying to help, support, but they are all on the other side of life, behind the door. They are visitors, and you are sick. It's very scary.

It happens that you wake up in the morning, look out the window - the sun is there, the weather is beautiful - and you think how good it is.

And then once - and you remember: you have cancer. This thought did not leave me for about a year. In principle, I was wondering if the moment would even come when I would not think about it. And now - when seven years have passed - I wake up and no longer think that I am sick.

" The story of a woman who recovered and adopted 9 children" title=""Cancer patients are the happiest people." The story of a woman who recovered and adopted 9 children" src="/assets/images/42b1445e8c61d56c86269df77acb7289/f5362d9e6b4e9285b56b92930a852736.jpg">

Photo: from the personal archive of Svetlana

I went through six sessions of chemotherapy, 25 sessions of radiation, two years of hormone therapy. I added 15 kilograms to my usual weight - the first time I had bruises on my sides, because I could not fit into the corners, getting used to my new body. I am grateful to fate that after six months - during chemotherapy - I got into the group "Women's Health". The support of people who themselves have experienced all the horrors of the disease is worth a lot.

These women know what nausea after chemistry, baldness, awkwardness in the pool due to deficiencies of their own bodies. But most importantly - I saw women who live after a diagnosis. Someone is three years old, someone is five years old, someone is seven. Having returned home after the first such meeting, I told my husband - if I live at least five years and we don’t take a single child, I will look back at every day I live with longing, because I lived in vain. Indeed, even if I leave in five years, this child will already have something to remember.

For him, even these five years are important. They are better than living in an orphanage.

Everything came together like a puzzle - my husband and I came to the orphanage and met two brothers there. Then I asked my husband the question "Are you sure? Because if something happens to me, you will remain a widower not with three children, but with five." He said: "Yes, I take full responsibility.

" So we had the first foster children.

- We are sometimes told that we are well done - they gave our children a family, warmth, comfort. But what the children gave us is real happiness. They gave us hope and the opportunity not to cry for ourselves, but to help others.

" The story of a woman who recovered and adopted 9 children" title=""Cancer patients are the happiest people." The story of a woman who recovered and adopted 9 children" src="/assets/images/42b1445e8c61d56c86269df77acb7289/953ecf8bfc65ba0249874e86cd1f018d.jpg">

Photo: from the personal archive of Svetlana

Now, seven years later, my main occupation is to be the mother of 12 children. My husband and I adopted nine children. Our children accepted the kids with an open heart, realizing that everything was over - we had overcome the disease (and yes, I survived until the eldest daughter’s wedding). In addition, I am actively volunteering in the Women's Health group.

Every two weeks we go with the girls to meet with the women we just operated on. They are still sitting with “eggplants," with eyes wet from tears - they only go through through all this. We share our stories with them, tell us that there is life after cancer and that the disease must be defeated in three components: spirit, soul and body . Do not ignore the prescriptions of doctors and think that grandmothers and healing herbs will help. No, they will only aggravate.

I also had a moment of "trade" - the rejection of the diagnosis. I thought maybe I accidentally ended up here. And when I was prescribed chemotherapy, I refused at first. Instead of treatment, I went to Moscow to see a doctor whom I trusted. She double-checked all the data again and made the exact same diagnosis as the doctors in Orel.

Then she asked me why I refused therapy. I replied - I am scared, sorry for the liver, which is destroyed by drugs, sorry for the thick long hair. To this, the doctor told me: “On one side of the scale is your life, on the other - beautiful hair. If you were going to die, why do you need beautiful hair in a coffin? If you die, then what difference does it make to you, you die with a sick liver or a healthy ? " This was a kind of impetus, a sobering moment - I returned home and the next day I went for the first chemotherapy. Now I go through examinations every year - this is necessary for me and my peace of mind.

Sometimes oncologists, sometimes operating doctors, come to our Women's Health group, plus we have free exercise therapy for developing hands. The Volnoe Delo charitable foundation that supports us pays us theater tickets (we even had a trip to the Voronezh dolphinarium). It’s great when you feel the shoulder of a person who is in the same boat with you. Indeed, among patients there are administrators, chiefs, employees of banks who cannot tell anyone about their diagnosis because of fear of losing their jobs. Unfortunately, we still do not always treat oncology calmly and with understanding.

- For us there is no middle name, no age, no position - just a name. We communicate as sisters, friends who went through the same life situation and survived. There are times when people leave, and there's nothing to be done about it. We understand everything and do not hide our heads in the sand.

" The story of a woman who recovered and adopted 9 children" title=""Cancer patients are the happiest people." The story of a woman who recovered and adopted 9 children" src="/assets/images/42b1445e8c61d56c86269df77acb7289/e7a2b22d8423ed7fea56c8fab97f3ed8.jpg">

Photo: from the personal archive of Svetlana

Photo: from the personal archive of Svetlana

We definitely need to fight. It is necessary to revise your goals and determine what did not have time to do.

To do for real - without tinsel, with the realization that time is limited. In this case, you need to understand that there are things that are beyond your control. You can’t paint and plan everything. A disease does not spare anyone - it always catches by surprise. There is no one who would be ready for it.

Someone said: cancer patients are the happiest people. No matter how scary and strange it may sound, there is some truth to this. A disease is an opportunity to rethink a lot, think a lot and get ready. Sooner or later, we will all appear before the Court. However, cancer can be defeated.

It is necessary to collect all the willpower and fight. Yes, treatment is not as fast as we would like, but the sooner it is started, the better. I regret that I did not go to the hospital earlier, I regret that I tried to self-medicate, I regret that I have never done a mammogram. Much could have been avoided. If a person undergoes examinations and monitors his health, it will be easier for him to recover - he will be able to live a wiser, more real life.

As part of the World Breast Cancer Month charity program " Women's Health of the Volnoe Delo Foundation and Philips continue to engage in the All-Russian Social Initiative #YAPROCHLA. In October, the author’s film by Leonid Parfyonov and Katerina Gordeeva on the fight against breast cancer (you can watch it HERE) was released and free diagnostic tests for women across Russia were organized. Details of the #YAPROSHE cancer social campaign are available on the Philips website.

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